I’ve come to accept a few things in life, The sky is blue, water is wet and my mother is nosy enough that with out fail, she’s going to find our toys.
I have no problem admitting and discussing the fact that I’m kinky to anyone, who I am is no reason to be ashamed. I do however, do my best to keep it from my mother, mostly because explaining BDSM and mine and Dot’s relationship would be near impossible. At 67 years of age, she comes from another era, So to save time and numerous headaches we do our best to keep that private from her.
So, once a week or two, mom comes over and we go shopping so I can help her get some heavier stuff and basically be manual labor. EVERY time she visits she comes in to give my house a “once over”, visit the cat, and clean over top of things i have already done, It makes her happy so I tolerate it with as much good grace as I can.
The first time mom spotted something BDSM related, it was a Biggie, We have an under the bed restraint system, that I usually tuck under the matress, but this time I missed a strap. Mom spotted it and Immediately asked “whats that” ? well fuck. I replied on the Fly with “it’s for Dot’s back, when she spends the night, it helps her stretch out just by pulling the one Cord to tighten it and release muscle tension.” Not exactly the greatest explanation, but it satisfied her…Crisis averted.
The next time, I completely forgot the 7 inch long Silicone anal plug on the side of the tub from when I washed it. Again, the inevitable “whats that?” Question, and again thinking quick “it’s a bath bomb mom – Don’t get it wet or it’ll be a hell of a mess on the Floor, Dot has baths here and it helps her relax.” Again Crisis averted….
Thats the Give and take with mom….I hide toys up on the top shelf of my Closet, because she’s 5’2 on a good day and won’t ever find ’em up there, I’m also sure mom thinks that Dot and I, by now are professional movie reviewers with the amount we’re watching when she calls.
I’m sure even the most liberal of us all have people that we go out of our way to explain BDSM type things to others as mundanely as possible. With my mom, it’s never boring, keeps me on my toes and helps me with attention to detail. if I keep it up, I might even get to bullshit better than Ferris Bueller.
At the very least, Dot and I are always laughing when I relate one of these stories, with my Mom, we’re never bored. lol